Life is full of unexpected and moderately intense moments. We always resist the temptation to blow a gasket or manage triggers that make us flow out of character. So, what is our response to this idea of self-control? I will use the words of Warren Buffet, who said, "You will continue to suffer if you have an emotional reaction to everything that is said to you. True power is sitting back and observing things with logic. True power is restraint. If words control you, that means everyone else can control you. Breathe and allow things to pass."
We are to self-regulate, which takes effort and practice. When you feel triggered, you need to stop and observe the actions that trigger you and control your response to them. What is your emotional reaction to this trigger, and why? Did something happen to make this trigger a deeply rooted issue that makes you lose your self-control? When we dive into the 'why,' we can find cause and effect and when and where these issues began. We bring awareness to an area of opportunity in our lives, which is the first step in the A-D-A-P-T process toward sustainable habit change.
When we tap into our awareness or power, we find through calm observation that we can control some underlying issues causing distress. With this, we can build a desire toward change, the second step of the A-D-A-P-T process, and focus on taking action, which is the third. Taking action focuses on specific goals to help us manage our triggers and impulses. In this part of the process, accountability is vital. The change process takes perseverance and time, the final two steps of A-D-A-P-T and the most important to sustainable habit change. Once we begin striving toward our goals, our level of restraint to backslide or allow triggers must be elevated.
But what if we struggle along the way or allow our loss of control to disconnect us from the people around us? That's a good question. You will have to recover and fix the messes you create. Accept responsibility and the consequences of your actions. You can walk through the steps of the A-D-A-P-T process knowing that bridges aren't quickly rebuilt, and it may be more challenging than you anticipated to get to the other side. However, we must attempt to mend the perception that we have no self-control.
I challenge you today to exercise restraint by resisting temptations, managing your impulses, and creating action around the triggers that set you off. Remember that your actions have consequences; we should lift the perception that we cannot self-regulate.
The Positive Advancement Family.